After the phone call, I went for a walk in the gorge because I didn’t know what else I could do. As the walls of stone rose up on either side of me, all I could think about was plummeting from their tops.
I think the “what if you knew when you would die” question reveals a lot about my feelings about death. I think I would be scared and upset if I found out the date was more than 5 years from now. I often think, looking forward, if the next year is just going to be more of this, then I’d rather die. Looking backwards, I usually think, last year was really just more of the same.